The Plan

I have made a lot of crazy decisions in my life. Putting my phone number all over King Street in Old Town Alexandria just might top the list! (If you want to know how I got to this point, check out my Back Story.)

A few days after walking out of the bar and not getting Ben's number or making a move, I started thinking about my options.

A) Get over it and move on.
B) Do what other people do and post on Craigslist Missed Connections and then get over it.
C) Go back to the bar the next week on the same night to see if he's a regular. And then get over it.
Plan C was a dead end. Enter my crazy Plan D- a sign!

Here was my Plan D:
1) Write up a sign. Keep it simple, but make it slightly vague so randos wouldn’t be able to say they’re Ben without some kind of proof.

2) Make copies and tape them up in Old Town Alexandria the afternoon of Dec. 31. I knew this would be the most effective day because thousands of people would be in Old Town celebrating New Years Eve. In fact, the Washington Post billed it as one of the best places in the area to spend NYE. Perfect, the sign will surely be seen then!
3) Prepare for the incoming deluge of calls and texts I was about to get flooded with! The plan was to send all calls to voicemail and listen to all of them. Text messages would get a response stating that this was real and I was still looking for Ben.

On NYE, my friend Jennifer helped me post the signs all along King St. It took about 40 minutes to tape them up on both sides of the road. We strategically placed them near every pay-for-parking station and lots in front of the Light Horse where I had met Ben.

Within 20 minutes of starting, I was getting my first phone calls and text messages. I directed everything to voicemail as planned. In that first hour we decided on a hashtag so we could follow the story on social media, hence #FindBen.

We watched Instagram and Twitter first. That’s where we were going to be able to see the pictures spread. I reached out to local bloggers Scott and Al from In a DC Minute and told them that I was the Courtney who was looking for Ben. I let them know that it was a real story, not an internet hoax, like so many of these things turn out to be.

I truly was looking for a good looking guy who really knocked my socks off… and that I chickened out to do anything about.

Within the first hour I had gotten a couple dozen calls and texts. I created an Old Town Courtney Twitter account. It was going to be the fastest and easiest way to watch one sheet of paper and a sharpie grow into something bigger than I even imagined.

My friends and I went out for NYE in Old Town and kept our eyes open for Ben. Everywhere we walked people were looking at the sign, taking pictures of it, texting me for a description so they could keep their eyes open for him and calling me as I stood right next to them
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The entire city of Alexandria was on the hunt for Ben with me and it was amazing! I couldn’t believe how many people called and text in that first day wishing me well.

From about 2 p.m. on the 31^st until I went to bed after the New Year, I had at least a hundred calls and texts. While they were mostly wonderful, positive and uplifting, none of them were from Ben.
Mixed in with the well-wishes, I got calls from local news outlets asking for interviews. I called them back and set up a time on New Year’s Day for an interview if I didn’t find Ben.

After thinking about it a bit, and discussing it with friends and still not hearing from Ben, I decided to do the interview.

That’s when I knew this was really going to go everywhere!

By the time the 4 o’clock news hour came, my story was on Fox News DC. And it re-aired every news cast that evening and the next morning. I knew exactly when it aired on the 1^st, because I would get an onslaught of new calls and texts!  
  By the 2^nd, the story started getting picked up by affiliates all around the country. I could tell which affiliate picked up the story and aired it on their news cast by the incoming calls and area codes. I was still monitoring all the voicemails and responding to all the text messages, but I still hadn’t heard from Ben.

At this point, I had absolutely no idea if I would even hear from him. I kept listening to all of the messages. What if he called and I missed it? Dear god! I couldn’t possibly dork this up again, especially after everything I just put myself through!

Finally a call came in and a message was left. “Hi Courtney. You’re probably screening your calls, but this is Ben.”

Holy crap! Could this be it? Could I have finally found Ben? Time to call him back!

The Back Story

Since the first of the year, whenever I talk to people and they find out that I'm the girl who put my phone number all over Old Town Alexandria I get a ton of questions. I'm finally ready to start answering some of them.

This is one of the craziest stories to tell and it gets a little lengthy, so I'm going to try and break this up into three parts. 

Here's the back story:

The week before Christmas 2013 I went out with friends on their annual bar crawl in Old Town. I made up my mind before leaving the house that I wasn't going to make any crazy life choices and would try and stay low-key for the night. To give you some insight, I'm a pretty outgoing, adventurous woman. So to say I'm going to have a low-key night is really a feat on its own.

The group is out in Old Town Alexandria and I'm the only single person in our group, no exaggeration.  (There are a lot of stories to tell about the excruciating experiences I've had while dating here in Old Town. I'll go into those later.) My friends, being who they are, keep their eyes peeled for guys for me.

My best friend starts talking to a guy. He's good looking enough. She then ropes me into the conversation. From there the conversation takes off between him and I and then my friend moves on.  She's feeling accomplished because she's found a guy for me. 

After many drinks and lots of in-depth conversation about things that don't involve the usual crap you hear when you meet a new person (you know: where do you work, what do you do, where are you from, blah, blah, blah), he's asking if I'm seeing anyone.

Nope, I'm not.

 He's not seeing anyone. He's totally single.

Ok, cool.

Want to go home with me? No.

I'm thinking back to the "let's not make bad decisions plan" I made before leaving the house. 

I stick to my plan and decline. However, I'm still very intrigued and interested. I want to know more about this guy, I want to see him again, I want to spend time with him. He's still interested in me even though I've said no. He keeps asking things about me.

I’m over here thinking how the hell do I go out in the most boring outfit ever, not planning on meeting anyone and turn around and meet someone that actually interests me?

When he walks out to the dance floor, I write my number on a napkin, give it to the bartender to give to him and walk out the door without saying goodbye. Can you say CHICKENED OUT!!!

Out of this entire experience, this may be *the* regret I have... that I didn't just make a move and at least been proactive asking for his number. Or personally given him my number.

One of the questions I get is why didn’t I just do that? I think the reason I didn’t ask for his number is that I was scared.  I don’t’ know what I was afraid of, I just was.

Why didn't I just personally give him my number rather than hoping it would make it to him? I know myself well enough that I would have changed my mind at the last second and would have left with him. That's just not what I wanted to do. It's not who I want to be. Going home with strangers from the bar is not who I am. One-night-stands aren't who I am and that's what would have happened. 

The next day I'm kicking myself for walking out the way I did. I spend a few days thinking about it and the regret is overwhelming. It gnaws at me.

So what the hell am I going to do?

And that's when I started concocting my plan.